


Until my last breath

by Wordlesslywriting



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Confusion, Falling In Love, First Crush, Galaxy Garrison, Getting Together, Keith (Voltron)-centric, M/M, Pre-Canon, Pre-Kerberos Mission, awkward realizations
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-11
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-11-30 15:50:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11466738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wordlesslywriting/pseuds/Wordlesslywriting
Summary: As perusal Keith stumbles into adolescents with the longest sigh.





	1. Chapter 1

The desert conditions were hardly new; Keith had a long history living among the blistering sun and dry winds since infancy. There wasn’t much within the current scenery that changed for him to be too homesick, if anything when he stepped outside the facility he could sense some familiarity to comfort him when he felt like he's seen enough of metal. Which was why it gave Keith some courage and sentiments to wake up every morning. After all, Keith was in many ways fighting a ton of odds the way he gathered himself to settle inside the Galaxy Garrison. He wasn’t made of money or had a long history of scholars running in his blood (that he was aware of). If his childhood was in any indication he learned very fast of the few privileges he received.

He never looked down them though (not for long) rather he smirked at the momentum, he created. He used all what he could to prove to the world that he wasn’t a waste of space. The Garrison was a little too stiff in some regards but that couldn’t be avoided. Shiro was there, patiently watching out for him. That was all in the beginning that mattered. Without his father in the picture (recently) and only having Shiro these days is what edged him into joining the school. He liked space enough to pursue it with a simple goal.

When the classes started with crowds of people hovering his space Keith sighed too long that a fly almost flew into his mouth. It was like a sick joke of having to listening to the same conversations he heard from his previous levels of schooling. The people that he was forced to mingle with were all in one word: idiots. All their pestering logic of social problems were something that made him want to hurl himself out to space. But all he could do was keep everything bottled up and grimace when people around him couldn’t take a hint that he didn’t care two shits about their love lives. All he ever asked for them was to just shut up and focus on group projects or homework around him. Really, that was all. He just wanted a smooth road to finish school and then get a good chance off Earth and away from their problems.

“You shouldn’t write everybody off that quickly.” Shiro always gave him that same tone of an older sibling when he nudged him to interact. “Come on, what are you going to do when I graduate?”

Keith at the time had shrugged it off without much second thought. He never was a social guy to begin with nor did he bother to utilize them as he continued the semester. There was no need or haste to mull over it when Shiro was still there by his side. It wouldn’t do him any good to over think about that dreadful future.

“I’ll get by,” He looked straight ahead, “I always had before I met you.”

And it was true.

As far as Keith could remember before meeting Shiro, he had thought of the world as something as troublesome. Too many pestering social structures, too many insufferable privileges that cut off majorities and too many inescapable developments that would arise with time and age. There was hardly anything that caught his eyes the way he was focused towards his bond with his father and the small world orbiting his daily chores. He was adventurous the older he became when his father drove him out of their home and into new settings that forced Keith see how societies were noisy concepts. To children, teens and adults Keith had made enough sense to see how the world was far chillier, and divided in invisible ties. That was why by the time, he became well acquainted with the courses and having Shiro Keith was all stumped when he learned about Matt Holt.  
  
He wasn’t that impressive.  
  
Rather, he was a shy meek kind-of-guy; the type that would make Keith look like a bully if they put them together in one place. He wasn’t shocked when Shiro announced that he was friends with him. Shiro had always been too friendly to not have any. Especially the way the new guy had the stereotype to be a loner or too passive to be bullied daily. The few conversations that they did have didn’t prove anything different the way the guy had his shoulders slumped during the crowded cafeteria. Or how he always had a textbook and homework by side. He truly was a nerd and he got along with Shiro making Keith wonder how long he could until he would act like a brash jealous little brother.  
  
It took two weeks. The guy was just too sweet, too polite around him. It made Keith feel like he was always in a middle of an interview the way Matt watched him closely when they sat opposite during breaks or when Shiro was making sure Keith did his homework. _Awkward_ , Keith’s mind kept repeating when Shiro would lag behind them during hallways because other students would want to have a word with him. Matt wouldn’t say much but smile softly when he felt Keith looking him. He would twitch and fidget with his fingers and try to fix his glasses; it only made Keith angry, his blood would burn hotter, and the size of his frown increase tenfold.  
  
He hated how Matt wasn’t ugly. His hair may have been tousled and unevenly cut but it suited him. He was still scrawny but it made him more appealing (if you were into nerds). His voice wasn’t shit either, after long hours of having him tutor him when Shiro couldn’t made Keith realize something almost crucial. He didn’t want to voice though; oh no, that was something Keith would never want to admit. But it turned out that life wouldn’t listen to him even on a good day. If anything, what all these small interventions he had with himself left him all exacerbated.  
  
Matt Holt would make Keith have a premature heart attack the way he would awkwardly want to persist to get to know him. It was a strange friendship; Keith just couldn’t back away from it. It was like Shiro was conscious of what Keith was dealing with the way he got Matt to sit always too close for Keith’s heart to handle. Or have Keith be the one to teach Matt more self-defense techniques. The constant association he had with Matt was driving him mad. He needed an outlet.  
  
One where Shiro would stop giving him those looks like he knew what Matt was doing to him. Or have Matt becoming worried about him when Keith started to eat before him and Shiro. The tutoring sessions were less too, when Keith felt like heart was working overtime. He had to do something. He knew that by the way his own lungs started to crumble by the lack of metaphors and stupid puns Matt made. He missed how naïve Keith used to be before having a crush. When the world was more plainly defined.  
  
That was why he hated the years that separated him and Matt, he was still seen as an untruthful kid. Whereas, Matt was a little closer to leaving this teen angst shit train Keith was barely coming into terms with. They both strangely liked enough cartoons to start talking again, but Keith couldn’t stop thinking about Shiro and Matt being more likely to become something more. They weren’t roommates but their rooms were close enough to have them conveniently hang out more. It was a spiral; having these kinds of thoughts at night. Where the silence was daunting.  
  
He didn’t know when his body and mind starting working out of sync, all he knew was that his brain had one thought and his body in turn went the different direction. His knuckles hurt, his throat sore from all the water pushed down harshly not only that but he was tired of all the metal perceiving his soul. So, he walked it off, then ran passed the hallways and eventually buckled down when he made outside. Where the moon was out and the stars telling, him stories his father used to repeat in all his memories. He didn’t count the hours he was gone, it didn’t feel necessary the way nature calmed him down. When the sun rose, Keith was ready.  
  
Not for the long-term future but for at least today. His heart was still fighting all his naivety and uncertainties. But it felt like something was settled in the way he walked back to his room without aching too much. When he ate breakfast, it was the same thing the way he felt comfortable enough to smile softly back at Matt in plain view. He didn’t look at Shiro afterwards when he did but he was sure that Shiro was happy for Keith finally settling in and accepting new people in. Even if took a little long and a lot of persuasion in between.


	2. Coming back for more

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After mulling over the pros and cons of accepting his fate, Keith made his choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As per usual I am late to fandom events. Oh well, at least their prompts get me pumped to write for both rare pairs and for my fandoms.
> 
> Prompts Used: Bitter, Sweet, Going Out, First from vld rare pair week.

After the revelation, Keith hardly attempted to make another move. There were no drastic turns or sudden confessions in the midst. (He sucked at them anyways.) It didn't help that Keith didn't exactly grow up with having heart-to-heart conversations all willy-nilly. His father did his best with their circumstances that they were dealt with; that, and they were both awkward people when it came down to talking about their feelings. Emotions were never a problem, it was just that sometimes it was hard to find the right phases and words to use. Besides, he learned that actions were louder than words.

Having to come into terms of falling in love was already a huge step for him. For someone like Keith, it was both scary and exciting to see how there were still so much he needed to experience. He was still confused about how crushes worked, so that naturally led him to stop himself early on before anything horrible could have happened. Keith had learned to be cautious to the unknown. It was the only way to survive. In the matters of love, it felt like a natural step too. To wait and watch his environment before treading off recklessly.

So, he did his best to continue doing his homework like normal with Shiro and Matt. Resumed on working with trying to get Matt to up his stamina (though it could never really compare to Keith’s or Shiro’s.) Stumble when Matt did something cute (which was happening a little too often for his heart to handle), and attempt to maintain his feelings in check before someone would notice how much Matt affected him. It was a stressful kind of living; having to fend off these emotions that endlessly wouldn’t stop. Having these kinds of thoughts scared him the way they were coming off strong. It made Keith feel like an animal; the way he couldn’t escape this new reality.

Every day was a new battle. Where Keith would have to prove to himself that a crush wouldn’t stop him from living. To have a spark of hope that maybe one day he’ll see Matt as a friend again and not something that could crash his world. It didn’t look like it would work the way his heart couldn’t stop itself. Especially how Matt proved to him every day that he was the missing link of his life. (The one that made Keith truly happy to witness these new kinds of developments.)

The world didn’t revolve on falling in love; it was just one aspect. His father had told him that countless of times. But that didn’t mean that his father ever downed played love, but there was a truth in there. Love was an important piece, to live, to experience and protect. However, there were other sides that needed to be prioritize too. Like the will to adapt to survive any environment and circumstance, to continue the road of curiosity and learn all the little secrets life has to offer.

From all the short years Keith has lived through, he was now in this new side where it was colliding with his past.

One where Keith was beginning to explore. To feel how truly vulnerable, he could be. To see how far he could reach and how far he dared to fall. It was a maze that was uncharted; something that he was sure his classmates had already gone through when he stubbornly tried to stay away. Doing nothing was a safe current, a spot where Keith hardly ever stayed when he felt like he could go beyond. Like getting to know Matt was never in the plan, but it still came into his face. Now Keith had to check all the paths and feel the current push back and forth with ease, tension and uncertainty.

Keith almost wanted to throw up. But he didn’t. Thankfully.

It was actually a funny thing, the way his life was turning around. When one day he was mulling over his options of just doing nothing and then having Shiro come into the picture uncharacteristically.

“Do you want some help?” Keith frowned in confusion making Shiro explain himself, “I can get Matt alone with you so you can confess.”

His brain processed the words. “I thought you liked him.”

Shiro chuckled, “I do.” He started but quickly reassured him. “But not the same way you like him.”

“I don’t know.”

Shiro patted his back, “Okay. It was just a passing thought. If you ever change your mind…”

He left it in the air.

With all his thoughts racing Keith barely had any time to calm down as Matt sat down at their usual table for lunch. He asked about the atmosphere, making Keith stuttered while Shiro made a lame diversion Keith couldn’t bother to remember. All that was stuck inside his skull was the knowledge that he wasn’t as smooth as he thought he was. It was quite the opposite; having Shiro along the ride didn’t exactly sit well with him once the mortification settled in. Because it made him concede that his fears of being an open book could actually exist. That, and Keith seriously needed to upgrade his poker face.

Once his stomach ached less with having Shiro aboard, and Keith being more open with his own feelings he started to feel like there was room to wiggle a new future. One where maybe it was possible to have Matt glance at him with tenderness that would hopefully be only reserved for him alone. It was a start, that was all he could really say on the matter. With the way, Keith was feeling like a ping pong with his emotions going through a roller-coaster. Especially the way he bid all his hope into this new chapter that was manifesting in front of him.

It started out small; like catching Matt off guard with more secret smiles for him to only witness. Or becoming more willing to be Matt’s rag doll when they sparred while allowing small physical touches to last longer than he would have usually accepted. To give him more access to stepping into his own domain. They were all starting to add up, making Keith more nervous the way Matt walked forward without giving his own hint that he understood what Keith was trying to tell him

So, in those failed efforts he quickly asked him out to hangout on a weekend when he knew Shiro would be “busy” and when he was sure Matt had already spent a day with his family to be satisfied. Where once the weekend was rolling by slowly that he could squeeze in time to be with Keith. It was like a perfect chance to get alone and almost personal with him. When he was given a green light with their plans Keith almost felt like he could explode. (He was extremely happy that his poker face was improving as he tried to play it off.) That and Shiro was like a great brother to shield him from others catching a whiff on Keith’s romantic life.

Walking around the closest town with Matt was almost surreal. For most of his garrison days he was used seeing Matt in only in his uniform, now with this new image Keith couldn’t help but feel his skin start to warm up. (And he knew he couldn’t blame the weather for it. Not entirely at least.) He was happy that they had enough topics to go around that made him less tense as the hours spilled out. Joking around him was easy, getting closer was the same.

Having Matt this close was like a dream.

When they finished a movie, and were walking back to the bus to take them back to the garrison, Keith could have sworn the street lights accented Matt’s eyes perfectly. Almost like it was giving him a sign that his mouth should open and for syllables to form. To explain how his body was hyper aware of Matt’s laugh affecting him. It was too good to pass the way it felt so right to confess. He didn’t know why he paused, or how Matt knew something was up with him. All Keith knew was that when he paused he made sure that he was in front of Matt, his hands came out from his pockets, they were practically searching for a spot—any spot to hover. To make the right impression or at least the right atmosphere.

His ears picked up the way his heart throbbed, how he took a deep breath and whispered. “Matt…is it okay?”

He wasn’t sure what he was asking him. To confess? Maybe. To kiss him? Probably that one. Either way he inwardly cursed of his current height compared to Matt's. It forced him to look up and tip toe a little higher so then his face could reach Matt’s.

He barely heard Matt’s voice over his loud heart. “Yes.”

He didn’t waste a second; he brushed his lips with Matt’s. It was instantaneously, wanting to stay in that precise moment and never move. To imprint in this spot of having this giddy feeling of a mutual confession permanently inside his memories. However, he knew that he would eventually have to pull away. When he opened his eyes, and grounded his feet he couldn’t help but feel his face burn hotter the way Matt’s eyes were watching carefully and with amusement.

He sheepishly smiled, “Sorry it took me awhile to figure out what you were trying to say.”

Keith shrugged his shoulders nonchalant, “So long as you got the message, it’s okay.”


End file.
